And Then I Tried on my Pants…..

My friend Amy said that during quarantine, we should be putting on our jeans every few days to ensure they fit. Excellent advice but I wasn’t sure if by “putting on jeans” she meant just one leg or actually doing up the buttons. I would also seek clarity if this referred to the jeans that had been worn several times or the ones that just were washed…..

I braved the moment and with some encouragement, the button finally connected but the bigger issue was that I found myself busting out of the blouse.

I either need new clothes or a new exercise program. Since I am a natural shoppping disaster, I opted for a new exercise regime.

I dug in and looked at the options. Not that this was hard. It seems my entire social media feed has been hijacked by spandex. My favourite articles leaned towards “more is less”. These articles are fairly firm that I have wasted hours and hours at the gym. I could have told you that but it was nice to have it confirmed by perfect strangers promoting their own program for a mere $69.99 per year. Of the zillion programs to choose from, I really leaned towards “change in just 7 minutes”. So did my husband. I told him that the seven minutes I was looking at required clothes.

The devil is in the details. Seven minutes was only going to be effective if I also adjusted my diet. Fair comment. I chose the Mediterranean diet; specifically French. The French like red wine and cheese. Me too! In fact, I like French bread so much that I bought a bread maker I also expanded into Swiss chocolate.

So many changes and yet….. the button still had to stretch to find the hole. What do the French do differently? Oh, right. The benefits of regularly smoking.

My adapted version of the Mediterranean diet was more like being on vacation. If I was serious about more buttons finding the hole, I needed stronger action on the exercise and food front.

This led me to contemplate running. Ugh. Has it really come to this? Running hurts. Those first 10 seconds could kill me. Just thinking about it makes me crave Advil. I used to like running but then, I used to be 30.

If I run, I might feel like a blender. There is a chance that all that wiggle and jiggle might be whipped up and purified creating redistribution either that or I will die on the roadside.

Confession. Running reminds me of who I am and who I used to be. This is likely why I love the Mediterranean diet; so many comforts that cushion deep rooted denial of reality.

It’s time to let all that go. I really have no more excuses. I am unemployed, in quarantine and have reorganized the cutlery drawer. I used to wear the t-shirt that said “No Time” but even that doesn’t fit anymore.

So I laced up and ran. The first 10 seconds almost killed me. The second 10 seconds weren’t any easier but I focused on fresh starts. I also looked for any platform of inspiration. Imagine my surprise when inspiration came in the form of a podcast featuring J. Lo and shaking it big time at the Super Bowl. I was so intrigued that I googled. OMG! She just turned 50 and she has the MOVES! Also long hair but that’s another story.

If COVID19 has taught me anything, it is that there are second chances and opportunities come disguised as challenges.

I will admit that somewhere along the line I got fatigued with a sense of failure and sinking into bread, red wine and chocolate was infinitely nicer than making the effort to try again and risk defeat. My button hole wasn’t just about the fit, it was finding my whole fit in the bigger picture. It’s about taking steps towards living the life I want to live; that life that I had stuffed into the drawer and labeled “one day”.

So I opened the drawer and “one day” started “today”. One foot in front of the other. Small steps that go from 10 seconds to longer. And by the way, my “one day” gets to dress in leggings!

Here’s to opening the drawer and getting the button to fit plus a little bit more…..

With love,

Shelley